Cast Your Burdens on the Lord...

I love the visual and the feeling behind 'throw your burdens'. Sometimes it seems easier to bury our burdens deep inside and it just simply doesn't help. It usually makes things worse. I have found, time and time and time again, that relying on my Savior to carry these burdens makes it all bearable and has helped me to grow as a person.

I was asked recently why on earth people rely on scripture to know what is 'right' or 'wrong'. I found myself looking inward and contemplating why it is that Scripture is so important to me in my life. Certainly I would be able to make the decision to not steal or lie or cheat without it coming from God's Word... so why do  I feel the need to read the Bible regularly?

I think the person I was talking has never felt the encouragement and validation that often comes from scripture. I also think that I rely on it not specifically to tell me what to do or how to act, but to convey a spirit of love.... to encourage through difficult times, to speak truth about human nature and how to view others. I don't know. Like I said, I was left contemplating and did not have a good answer. Except that I know that for me,  I am a better mom, wife, friend when I spend time in scripture on a regular basis. And it isn't because I read the ten commandments. ;)

Reading this yesterday reminded me, in some ways, of that conversation. Because reading and viewing and thinking about this one little verse gave me the strength to again cast my burdens, to again have faith in the One, to again... face another challenge. When humans are so forgetful, so controlled by emotions, and so carnally minded... how could you NOT see the benefit of reading scripture regularly?!

I thank God for His word that does all of these things... encourages, reminds, validates, chastises, envelopes, guides, teaches. And I hope that the time I spend reading, meditating and studying does make me a little bit of a better person. 

Because the present is the closest we come to eternity.

I've been reading The Screwtape Letters. Great book. I just shake my head, nod, and/or sigh heavily thru every chapter. 

The one that has stuck out the most for me so far is the one in which Wormwood tells his nephew about how to distract the human from the reality of time and thus, his influence. Wormwood says that the best thing to do is distract the person from the present time. The past is ok for this, but is pretty much written and unchanging. Oh, but the future! If the human is in a constant state of concern, worry or simple thought about the future... then the present time will be lost and the person will be no closer to "The Enemy". He makes the comment that the present is the most like eternity. Interesting.

Got me thinking... what does my 'present' usually look like? Right now it looks like focusing on getting my thoughts down and out of my head. :)

I've been putting more thoughtful effort into being present in the present.... like, when the boys get home from school, stopping whatever else I may be doing and looking in their eyes, sitting across from them as they eat their snack. Focusing on the moment with them instead of the list that is ongoing and forever in the future...  This thought has brought me to laugh a little more. Listen more. Ignore distractions and focus on the relationships in our home. Funny thing is that I thought I was doing that before.

Celebrity Status

We made the local paper! This is from TMB's game last Tuesday. He is the player on the left. He is the pitcher so he has to wear a helmet. You can see DH, me and TO on the far left watching intently. (TBB was running around playing!) It was a really good game and TMB made at least 4 outs, one of which the ball went to center field, they threw it in and from the pitcher's mound he ran to the third baseline to tag the runner! It is exciting to watch him make plays like that effortlessly.

Quote of the week

Me: "Wow. That's a lot of red you're wearing today."

TBB: "Ya!!! I know! Then the zombies won't see me."

Me: "What? What do you mean? Who told you that?"

TBB: "Ya, that's true because {The Middle Boy} told me that zombies can't see red. So, they won't see me today and I'll be saved."

Me: "Oh. Ok."

*shaking my head

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"Drawing makes me feel calm"

TMB focused on his drawing the other night while DH was reading.

Birthday!

Last Sunday was DH's birthday. I put a lot of effort into surprising him. It is really hard to hide things from you significant other on a weekend. Week days are far easier!!!! But, I laughed my way thru the many changes in plans and made the best of everything. Here are a few pictures to tell the story:

There was one balloon for each year of his life. Each balloon had a note attached that had a reason he is loved. There were ones from me, the boys and his mother. It was really fun getting it together and surprising him. I love love love the look on his face as he read each one.

Happy 34th, Darling.

Pine Wood Derby

The Oldest with his friend listening to the rules.

The Oldest's car is the one in second place.

The Oldest in the middle, checking results.

The Middle Boy watching for his car.

The Middle Boy setting his car for a race.

Pine Wood Derby was a few weeks ago. That was an exciting few days for our family. The boys were very proud of their cars, but they weren't necessarily fast but they were complete cars. It was The Oldest's last chance at Pinewood Derby and The Middle Boy's first..... bittersweet.

Cub Scouts

The Oldest getting his Bear award.

The Oldest pinning his momma for all her help in earning his Bear!

The Middle Boy pinning his momma after earning his Wolf.

DH. What a hottie.

Future Cub Scout.

In March, both boys were recognized! The Oldest had earned his Bear earlier in the year but we had not made it to a Pack Meeting, so he was given the Bear badge and moved up to Webelos. He really enjoys the cub scout program and learns so much thru it!

The Middle Boy earned his Wolf a few months early (he has until his birthday) and was very excited because it is the first badge that he has earned!

I have been an assistant Den Leader for TMB's den for a few months now. It is nice to be involved with him in that way. Like my fashionable "Den Mom" shirt? You could have your own.... hahaha!

The Middle Boy and Baseball

The Middle Boy swept up a ground ball and threw it like it was no big deal.

Straight to first base and an easy out.

His team after this game.

He is really enjoying baseball season. He is one of the oldest boys on his team and so he plays really well for this age group. He is mostly on the pitcher's mound, but it is coach pitch. He  does a great job of stopping the ball, throwing and catching. Dh and I are thinking he would make a good pitcher next year. He started working with his batting coach yesterday on pitching techniques. I'm excited to see him develop as a player.

When was the last time I was here?

I really don't remember the last time I posted. I should have looked instead of instantly clicking 'new post'. Oh well. I am working this week on making each year's posts into books. I am really excited about this project! It has been invigorating to go thru and read my old words and thoughts. It is nice to see where I have been and compare to where I am now. I saw a quote just this morning that applies:

There is nothing noble to being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.
It is attributed to Ernest Hemingway but these days I just don't trust every quote. No matter who said it, I agree. I hope that I have morphed over the years into a superior form of myself.

I know that the boys are certainly morphing before my eyes....

The Oldest is ending 4th grade in a few weeks. He has had a very difficult year of growing up. Realizing his own strengths and weaknesses and falling prey to the urge to compare himself. I see so many of my worst qualities mirrored in him and it breaks my heart. It has also been a huge motivation for me to change myself and hopefully impact him for the better. He is on a field trip to Arlington Stadium today and was really excited this morning. He is becoming such a responsible young man. He is very good at offering to help around the house, asking to learn new skills, and learning new things. He is easily discouraged but I think that is mostly a phase.

The Middle Boy is finishing up 3rd grade and loves life. He is such a positive, talkative, athletic boy. Last night as Dh was reading from our family chapter book, TMB was drawing. Pencil to paper the entire time and proudly brought it over to me towards the end. He makes such elaborate drawings of fight scenes. It used to concern me, but since he is not obsessed with aggression and just likes to draw these scenes, I don't mind it. He told me earlier this week, "Mom, drawing just relaxes me." I'm glad he has something like that.

The Baby/ The Big Boy... is a handful! His is constantly on the go. His mind never rests! He talks all the time and I have been known to say, "Can you please be quiet for just a few minutes. I just need to hear myself think for a moment." He is a hilarious companion tho and I have loved being home with him this year. He said something to me earlier that had me laughing out loud and I cannot for my life remember it now, but he is constantly surprising me with his wit, awareness and simple questions. And he brings me yellow flowers daily. Which just melts my heart. He is so very ready for kindergarten! He is even starting to read. And enjoys it. :D

Dh and I are doing really really surprisingly well. We are more in love than we have ever been. We are happy with each other. I knew that this wonderful man was hidden somewhere beneath his rough exterior, but now I see it all the time. I love it. I hope that we never return to the misery we endured before. All those years of uncertainty, disagreement, disappointments, all those years... I cannot tell you how wonderful it is to be a part of a healthy and strong marriage. I know that we will continue to have ups and downs but there is a new level of commitment that wasn't there before.

So that's the quick update.